Posts tagged ‘devotion’

February 21, 2013

Tell Me The Story That Will Heal My Soul

wheat

I have been teaching an in depth course on the spiritual interpretation of the Song of Solomon for the past few months which has kept me happily immersed in the beautiful language of love, but as this season is winding down I am taking a Spring Sabbatical to flesh out the new inner workings of The Spirit stirring in my heart.  This beautiful message of the Indwelling Life of Christ.  I have found myself vacillating from anger ( why didn’t anyone teach this to me sooner) to a beautiful sense of the eyes of God upon my frame and his wonderful timing of things in my life.

As I find this message coming out in the strangest of places and conversations, I know it is time to put pen to pad and chronicle this journey…and so we begin with story.  Beautiful wonderful story.  Thank you to Major Ian Thomas who has passed on to be with the Lord for listening that day in your college dorm room, and receiving this message for the Body of Christ.  Thank you to my mentors and friends who have journeyed with me and ahead of me declaring the “truth” and nothing less than the truth.

In a recent article from Clarissa Pinkola Estes she makes the following statement about culture and narcissism that I find relevant and worth pondering:

“Narcissism is not falling in love with oneself; it is falling for ‘the false self”… the one which has no real heart, a cardboard self that can only mimic tenderness and toughness, but has no winged soul.

Thus a culture diagnosed with narcissism is not in love with itself, as suggested by the reductive epithet, ‘me-ism.’ A narcissistic culture is in love with a false self, one that is not real, one that is perceived to have no real issues, no reliable gifts, no real harms and thereby, no real solutions.

But, there is ever hope. Prognosis for an ill culture? It depends… mostly on cultura cura, how smaller healthier cultures within the ill culture will expand outward to heal the larger society.
One of the first ways to destroy a culture and a people, is to destroy their stories. One of the first ways a culture that has become ill can be restored is by adding back the stories that are sustaining to its people.

I have heard this challenge in my spirit.  To scribe the story that will heal the soul, and free the spirit and point the heart to the resurrected reality of the Living Christ and Savior who died, rose, ascended and is coming again.  Our Christian culture has lost the story in the midst of the madness of crafting our own life, planning our destinies, patenting our image, and demanding adherence to disciplines that are dead outside of the reality of the spirit of God at work in our mortality.

So I ask you, have you ever heard a grain of wheat talking to itself?

To be continued….

October 5, 2012

Corinthians Remix

A Musing From Corinthians…

If I can speak the eloquence of the ages

In tongues of angelic sound

But cannot hear the forlorn cry of the lonely heart

Desperate for a Word balm of kindness-

I am the worst noise of empty clash and gong

Tin, ear -ringing, cold, ego -pride fluster- in brass.

 If I can see the pathways of the depths of man

And hold the balance to the weight of every thought and intent

With calculating accuracy reduce actions to a set of predictable

Formulaic rhythms and reasons-

Bringing mountains to molehills-

But I cannot see hunger in front of me,

Withholding all crumbs from my table of insight,

As precious morsels from an enlightened existence-

I alone am the most pitiable, weak, and impoverished of souls.

 If I leave the world of men

To live upon the heights of ascent,

Deliver myself a sacrifice for the causes of greatest good

But do not live with my heart pierced by the wounds

Of the afflictions of those of earth-

And bear their life in my open, upraised hands-

To hold in love,

To receive in love,

 To give in love….

My own soul fire is but a dim flickering wick

 that profits the world-

Nothing.

© Christina Dammerman 2012

 

 

 

 

 

 

June 10, 2012

Putting The Pieces Back…

Returning to the old homestead, and putting the place in order after a renter of 11 years almost destroyed the intent and reason of the ranch has given me a new perspective of the cyclical nature of God, and our part in restoring the land, and partnering with the original intent of cultivating the garden to the non garden parts of earth.  I am weary, and ache with the amount of work that needs to be done, but there is a story evolving around every corner. As I pick up random objects, trash, and pieces of a life, I find the hint of what was, and the vision of what is to come. I am straining to listen to the heart of the Father for this season in my life.  The phrase:  “Those who have ears to hear, let them hear” has taken on a new meaning.  This poem by Mary Oliver speaks to me during this time of transition. I thought I would share the “story” with you.

Breakage

By Mary Oliver

I go down to the edge of the sea.
How everything shines in the morning light!
The cusp of the whelk,
the broken cupboard of the clam,
the opened, blue mussels,
moon snails, pale pink and barnacle scarred—
and nothing at all whole or shut, but tattered, split,
dropped by the gulls onto the gray rocks and all the moisture gone.
It’s like a schoolhouse
of little words,
thousands of words.
First you figure out what each one means by itself,
the jingle, the periwinkle, the scallop
       full of moonlight.
Then you begin, slowly, to read the whole story.
May 16, 2012

The Turning

 I can feel the Earth tossing aside the blankets of her cool Spring bed as she moves to embrace the heat of Summer.  The Spring has been extravagant in its offerings of rain, the life giving hope poured into aquifers, and hidden places.  Will this be a thirsty Summer?  Will there be a cry for rain?  In the Earth?  In me?  I watch how nature doesn’t strive with the turning.  Obedient, and present with the days.  There is a quiet acceptance and a joyous celebration in the morning songs. It is here I discover the syllabus for this season.  There is a trust that though we change, and the turnings come to our lives, there is One who does not change. There is one whose love is constant, whose supply is constant, whose compassion is constant, whose care is constant, who neither slumbers nor sleeps as He watches over the work of His hand.  One who never ceases speaking us into being, and because he is, we are. 

James 1:17  Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of lights, with whom can be no variation, neither shadow that is cast by turning.

So, I listen to the praise of sparrows, who can not fall without notice from their Maker, and join with the Psalmist of Israel and turn my face to the heat of a new season, while I trust as I sing:   “I will praise the name of God with a song, and magnify Him with Thanksgiving” Psalm 69:30

May 3, 2012

My Restless Heart

“Thou hast made us for thyself, O Lord,
and our heart is restless until it finds its rest in thee.” ―St. Augustine

I have been pondering this reality for months.  We are made for our God. Not for any other endeavor but to worship the one who crafted us with his hands, his words, his breathe.  An object of His fascination and desire, we will stay in this state of discontent until our internal longings are satisfied with the beauty of His face. We have been torn from the purpose and meaning of our existence, and He is daily bringing us to a place of gazing, to discover our image.  To remind us of our reflection.  Often we catch a glimpse of our true selves in the kind face of strangers extending love to strangers, benevolent pauses as we consider one another in the hallways of life.  We hear our native tongue when healing syllables of life flow from lips that choose to bleed rather than hurl curses at the offender.  We are reminded for a moment that we belong “other” than this dysfunction of existence we tear our way through on any given day.  We belong to a kingdom ruled by a King of Righteousness who shall reign forever, and ever.  So, we comfort one another s restless hearts, as we gently lift chins to the horizon, and remind ourselves….we were made to gaze on beauty.

 

May 1, 2012

Mud On The Eyes

 

Mud On The Eyes

Job 29:15  ” I was eyes to the blind, and feet to the lame”

Mar 8:23  And taking the blind man by the hand, He brought him out of the village; and after spitting on his eyes, and laying His hands upon him, He asked him, “Do you see anything?”

Several things about this story strike me.  First, the blind man was not asking for help, not like in the case of blind Bartemaeus who cried out loudly after Jesus.  It says his friends brought him. Then, Christ led him out of the city, not his friends, Christ.  The Lamb of God, the Light of the World, took this blind man by the hand and led him….

No one from the town witnessed this…is it that they had had so many miracles worked in their midst, they weren’t curious enough to follow them out of town to see what might happen?  Whatever their lack of witness became a judgment against them.  The Lord told him not to go back into that village and share the miracle. What have we missed because of our lack of wonder?   We are called to rejoice when God moves over our brothers and sister in ways that brings sight, health, love , peace etc. lest we find ourselves without our own visitation.

What was it like to be led by God in the flesh from blindness to sight?

John Stott in his book ” Basic Christianity” makes the statement that fear is the greatest enemy of truth.  Because fear paralyzes our search.  This is true. I know in my own life I have been afraid to  “look” at certain things for what I might see in myself, in the subject, in others.  Yet we are called to search, and when we do we will find.  God’s biggest complaint with mankind is that they didn’t seek after Him.  I am on a hunt for “the lie” at the base of my own apple tree.  I want to dispel the paralysis that has kept me from seeking the depths of the mystery.  I am ready to be undone.  To be unsettled by the inconvenience of a true Christian conviction.  Spit upon the mud, and let me see…have mercy on me Son of David.

Rev. 3:18  “anoint your eyes with eye salve that you might see.”

I too, want to feel the hand of the Master lead me from darkness into His glorious light.  I don’t want to be paralyzed by fear of seeing I would rather be blinded by the light.  The last point is the value of Godly friendship.  Friendship led this blind man to his encounter.  But notice, they couldn’t lead him into the light, only God could do that.  They just put his hand in The Master’s then got to rejoice at the miracle.  Like the parable of the friend needing the bread at midnight Luke 11.  We don’t have the bread, but we know someone who does, and we go to him and ask, and He provides.

April 29, 2012

What do you see?

We each have something we can give to those around us, that bring life, and hope and encouragement. We can each participate in the “fast”  ( Isaiah 58) the Lord has called us to , in helping to lift up the feeble hearts, and hands, and lives of those in need, even if we seem to be the ones who need the help the most!  An encouraging story I have picked up along the way to encourage your vision-

 

Two men, both seriously ill, occupied the same hospital room.

One man was allowed to sit up in his bed for an hour each afternoon to help drain the fluid from his lungs.

His bed was next to the room’s only window

The other man had to spend all his time flat on his back.

The men talked for hours on end.

They spoke of their wives and families, their homes, their jobs, their involvement in the military service, where they had been on vacation..

Every afternoon, when the man in the bed by the window could sit up, he would pass the time by describing to his roommate all the things he could see outside the window.

The man in the other bed began to live for those one hour periods where his world would be broadened and enlivened by all the activity and color of the world outside.

The window overlooked a park with a lovely lake.

Ducks and swans played on the water while children sailed their model boats.. Young lovers walked arm in arm amidst flowers of every color and a fine view of the city skyline could be seen in the distance.

As the man by the window described all this in exquisite details, the man on the other side of the room would close his eyes and imagine this picturesque scene.

One warm afternoon, the man by the window described a parade passing by.

Although the other man could not hear the band – he could see it in his mind’s eye as the gentleman by the window portrayed it with descriptive words.

Days, weeks and months passed.

One morning, the day nurse arrived to bring water for their baths only to find the lifeless body of the man by the window, who had died peacefully in his sleep.

She was saddened and called the hospital attendants to take the body away.

As soon as it seemed appropriate, the other man asked if he could be moved next to the window. The nurse was happy to make the switch, and after making sure he was comfortable, she left him alone.

Slowly, painfully, he propped himself up on one elbow to take his first look at the real world outside.
He strained to slowly turn to look out the window besides the bed.

It faced a blank wall.

The man asked the nurse what could have compelled his deceased roommate who had described such wonderful things outside this window.

The nurse responded that the man was blind and could not even see the wall.

She said, ‘Perhaps he just wanted to encourage you.’

April 27, 2012

What Happens To Me When I Live?

The world is consumed with death.What happens to the body when we die, where do we go? What affects our placement in the after-life….but, I must ask , as Christians shouldn’t we be asking the “other” question?  What happens to me when I live?  Truly live.  Radically live.  Live the reality of the indwelling nature of Christ fully alive on the inside. What then?  What changes. What has to have new language because the old can not express this living of life?

I am going to be meandering here a bit I think.

What do you think?  What happens to us when we live?

April 24, 2012

At The Sound Of Her Name-

We are surrounded by myriads of voices each demanding our immediate attention. Some within, most without. Some with sound, others consist of data, image, and fonts of various sizes and shapes all competing to communicate their version of truth with each tap of the finger upon the keypad. We are a culture that is proving more dysfunctional and anti-relational in the midst of the greatest advance in networking and social media structures designed to help us converse and “stay connected”.  We are multitasking ourselves into sickness as though there were seven of us instead of one.

Mary of Magdala knew about voices.  Raging accusations against light, goodness, holiness, health. She had seven ghoulish quarrels battling for dominance at any given moment of the day.  Each of them despising her frame, scorning her worth, terrorizing her soul with the reality-she let them in.  Seven, until the day she encountered the power of silence with just one word from The Christ.

Mat 8:16  And when even was come, they brought unto him many possessed with demons: and he cast out the spirits with a word, and healed all that were sick:

She went from the cacophony of blasphemy to the holy hush of new birth.   I wonder who had the vision to see her whole?  Who brought her to him?  Or, did she run like the demoniac from the Gatarrenes who at the very hope of the name of Jesus upon his shore,  fought the legion of darkness to fall at the feet of Christ?

Luk 8:1-2  And it came to pass soon afterwards, that he went about through cities and villages, preaching and bringing the good tidings of the kingdom of God, and with him the twelve, and certain women who had been healed of evil spirits and infirmities: Mary that was called Magdalene, from whom seven demons had gone out-

Seven. Gone. Silence. What did it feel like to hear the sound of her own voice again? To be whole in her intentions, motives, conversations? What was it like for the Creator of the Universe to say her name?

Mary!

Is it any wonder we find her here in Luke, attending to the needs of her Savior?  In the company of the one who opened her prison, and shone his light into darkness and declared:  “Let her be…”  Is it any wonder that angelic presences straight from the throne room of God could not persuade her from her mission of finding Him at the tomb, this one who was her world of peace, was missing.  Nothing but Him would satisfy no matter how glorious.  She had come to dedicate her life to mourning, to perhaps pray away the fear that without the presence of his name the voices would return. In her agony  she couldn’t see, she looked toward her savior and saw a  gardener- In a sense He was.  The Second Adam come to the garden of mankind’s heart, to tend and to till.  He came first to this garden.

Joh 20:16  Jesus saith unto her, Mary. She turned herself, and said unto him in Hebrew, Rabboni;

Her name, upon his lips.  That familiar sound of the Master setting her free. The one true voice in a myriad of noise.  Her name spoken with resurrected life.  It was he, and that is all that mattered.

Lord say my name.  Silence is the beginning of sound. Speak your truth through me, that resurrected life would be my portion.

Sharing this with Seedlings In Stone

April 21, 2012

Change-A Vision of Love

-”you can’t really know something until you’ve seen it transformed by change. You must see it in all the angles of light and shadow provided for by time. You must see it in wind and in rain, under a blanket of snow, in the gentle light of spring, in the hazy heat of late summer, in the crisp cool of an autumn day. You must witness it in twilight and at sunrise, in thunderstorms and under the light of the moon and stars. Only then do you get a glimpse of the spirit lurking underneath. Only then do you begin to understand it.”-Andy Goldsworthy, artist as quoted by Danielle on her blog The Teacup Chronicles.

This quote has captivated my musing for several days now.  What a great observation of life.  I must ask the question if I  love with change in view?  Do I have the vision to see someone in a winter season, full of spring blossoms, and laden in the summer sun with fruit abundant?  Do I steady my heart gaze through long winter days of drought and dreary moments knowing that love conquers death?  Have I seen myself this way?  Do I believe in the faithfulness of my Maker, to shepherd me to new seasons?

Jer 29:11  For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, saith the LORD, thoughts of peace, and not of evil, to give you an expected end.

Our Lord has an expectation of future and hope for his Beloved.  As his friends we must ask ourselves if  we  “see” those in our care?  Do we watch expectantly for the first blooms combing the branches of the heart with gentle hands waiting for the promise of spring, or are we quick with the pruning shears lopping off relationships we are sure are dead only to mourn the blossoming branch laying on the ground withering, and separated from our life? I desire to have this kind of vision that sees woody, leafless branches in the grey of winter and can smell the fragrance of fruit.

Oh Lord.  Help me to keep my pruning hook in the shed.  You are the Master Gardener, you decide the shape of my life, mine is to receive, and give the life you have given me.  Open my eyes Lord. I want to see you at work in the Earth of my feet, the Earth of my hands,  and the Earth of my heart.

 

Shared with Seedlings in Stone.

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